Today's just one of those days, y'know? Like, you're so happy, you feel like you could laugh and cry... like you could run a mile or fall asleep as soon as your head hits the pillow. But at the same time, there's this really sad part inside of me that feels so empty and scared and... sad. My sister is engaged. She and her fiancé made it "official" today and I am so elated and I just want to smish her face all day. All she's ever wanted in life is to meet the perfect guy (for her) and make babies. And now her dream seems to be coming true. Honestly, she deserves this happiness and I always want her to smile like she was smiling today and I want to meet my future nieces and nephews and travel to Europe to see them... Oh, right. See? That's the problem. Once they get married, Pily is moving to Germany with her husband. EUROPE. So yeah. I'm beyond selfish. But I'm so scared. No more Pily to hear me bitch and moan about Glee... no more Pily to go fo...
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Confession
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I don't feel all that pretty. Ever. My nose is crooked and I think my eyes are too small. The shape of my face is wonky (it's neither circular nor heart-shaped... It's like a blob, really) and my teeth annoy me to no end. But, I know that my perception is my own. When people look at me, they won't see what I see and vice-versa. Oh, perception. Why must you trick us all?
Deal breakers:
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Issues that cause a relationship to fail. I only have one deal breaker. One. Uno. Un. It's a bit judgmental and definitely not nice (not to mention I'm never going to meet a guy in THIS province), but I can't help it. My deal breaker is I could never be with someone who doesn't share my political views. I can't help it, though. My family? We're HYPER-liberal. The way we see it, if a policy or practice will benefit the vast majority, in particular those who are defenseless, then why wouldn't we agree with it? If a guy votes PC (Progressive Conservative) or Conservative, it's an instant turn off. See? Judgmental.
Of Christmas Parties and Friendship
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I met a cute boy this weekend. He's really affectionate, and genuine, and ambitious, and humble, and considerate, and funny, and kind, and hardworking, and... wow. I know I romanticize guys upon meeting them (which is why when I fall, I fall fast and hard and the landing normally leads to months spent in an emotional coma, but that's neither here nor there), but I feel as though my impression of him is correct. After all, he's best friends with two of the sweetest, most genuine, most adorable guys I've met in my life. Don't fall for him. Don't fall for him. Don't fall for him.Don't fall for him. Don't fall for him. Don't fall for him.Don't fall for him. Don't fall for him. Don't fall for him.Don't fall for him. Don't fall for him. Don't fall for him. I kinda hate myself right now. Not gonna lie.
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She realizes she's in love when she can't forget the feel of his hand brushing hers. The hairs on her arm are literally standing and it looks like her arm is swimming with goosebumps. She's embarrassed that he has this effect on her, but whether he sees it or not, she doesn't know because this sudden realization cripples her. Makes it impossible for her to meet his eyes. "You okay?" She licks her lips, trying to bring some moisture to her parched lips. When did it become hard to swallow? When did it start to feel as though the walls were closing in on her? She finally meets his eyes and nods. He quirks an eyebrow, but chuckles softly. "A'right," he croaks and she realizes this sound is turning her on . It feels wrong. It feels weird. It feels repulsive. And those butterflies infesting her stomach? Yeah, they're not makin' it any better. Why does falling in love fuck everything up?
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It had been a long day at university. Too many assignments and too much work to do at his internship... he was swamped. He lugged to his computer and signed on to his university account. He was expecting an email from his Prof concerning his dissertation on the importance of physics in aviation. Sighing, he typed in his information. He rubbed his stomach absentmindedly and enjoyed the calm in the apartment. He smiled a bit, remembering the last time he was home alone. Looking at the computer, he clicked on his inbox. The first thing he saw was her name. He blinked once. Twice. Shook his head and clicked on the name; his heart pounding hard against his chest, making it a bit hard to breathe. Realizing he'd been holding his breath, he forced himself to breahe in and out; the air coming in out in a shaky sigh. Hey, I haven't talked to you in a while. How's life? He could almost hear the way her soft voice hesitated before inquiring after his life. She'd always b...