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Showing posts from January, 2011

Embarrassing Confession

I really like Glee. But lately, even with my love for this show, I can't bring myself to watch certain episodes. It hurts too much. I wish I was writing the show---not because I'd do a better job, but because I'd be watching the story unfold the way I want it to. *sigh* I'm so mind-blowingly pathetic. But such is life.
She feels the rage in her heart and doesn't care when she yells at her mother, hurling insults at her. She knows that her anger is unwarranted (her mother was talking to her sister in-law and she shouldn't have gotten involved), but she remembers the things she used to say. The condescending tone. The advice to "eat less" and "to take a long walk after dinner, lest she want to roll ." She glares, hating every part of the woman in front of her, and she rushes to the bathroom. She feels the anger swelling in her chest. Feels the muscles in her stomach contract as she leans forward. Feels the acid crawl up her esophagus. Feels the vomit spring from her mouth. There's a reason she was angry after all.

I'm sick. I didn't go to work. I have a SHIT TONNE of modules to edit. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!

Why did I have to get sick right now? HAPPY THOUGHTS HAPPY THOUGHTS HAPPY THOUGHTS HAPPY THOUGHTS Think HAPPY THOUGHTS.
I don't know what to do. I know I should do one thing, but a large part of me just wants to throw in the towel and give up. Is it even salvageable? Should I even bother? There's too much to fix. Too little incentive. Too much animosity. Why fix something that's been broken for so long?

Falling in love: the after-effects

Even though I'm over him, it still surprises me when I can remember all of the things I felt for him. The rush. The nerves. The unadulterated bliss I felt swell in my chest as soon as I saw him. Not even the knowledge of his political leanings saved my heart from falling. I hope he's doing well.

My Childhood Hero

First post of the new year.

So 2011 is upon us and it's weird... I feel as though this year will be my LAST year to get all my loose ends tied and finally make my dreams come true. Guess the reason for this is quite obvious: my plans for moving to Montreal in 2012... NEXT FUCKING YEAR! Like... REALLY. Mont-fucking-réal! I can hardly wait...! I love that city more than is natural. And to live there? After years of wanting this more than any other dream... It's unreal. So this year, I'll be buckling down. Crossing those Ts and dotting those Is... Ensuring that nothing will detain me from reaching my dream. I can't wait!