Marcela's 2013 Christmas Wish List: I'm the Cowardly Lion
I've been thinking lately about how lucky I've been this year. (#blessed) Sure, I had my trying moments; there were times when I was so frustrated I could scream, but most of the year was good. And yeah, I had my fair share of heartaches and sadness, but the positives outweighed the negatives. I made new friends, I saw new parts of the world, I learned more about myself.
Life gave me so many presents and I'm eternally grateful for 2013.
But despite all that, I still want certain things before the year is through. I'm as selfish as they come and there's no denying that. And some of the items on my list are abstract, intangible things, but there are a slew of others that can be bought. Things like:
-Pacific Rim
-Beyoncé
-HAIM
-The Little Mermaid
-The Rescuer's and The Rescuer's Down Under ('cause I'm a child)
-Happy Endings (seasons one to three)
I'm sure my family and friends will buy these things for me.
But those intangible, abstract desires? Only time will give them to me. Time and patience and perseverance and, if I'm honest with myself, a lot of bravery on my part. Because at my core, I'm realizing how much of a coward I am. At my core, I give up too easily when it seems I cannot get what I want. My pride and my ego always get in the way -- I'm always so afraid of looking like a fool -- and, try as I might, as positive and upbeat as my general outlook on life is, one bump in the road shifts my perspective. Always. I always equate these tiny bumps to unclimbable mountains and therein lies my problem: how can I get what I want, if I'm too scared to just go for it?
I do nothing but moan over my situation, rather than make the necessary moves to change it. Because I do know how to get these abstract things; I just have to find my courage.
And maybe that's all I need for Christmas this year: a little more courage.
Life gave me so many presents and I'm eternally grateful for 2013.
But despite all that, I still want certain things before the year is through. I'm as selfish as they come and there's no denying that. And some of the items on my list are abstract, intangible things, but there are a slew of others that can be bought. Things like:
-Pacific Rim
-Beyoncé
-HAIM
-The Little Mermaid
-The Rescuer's and The Rescuer's Down Under ('cause I'm a child)
-Happy Endings (seasons one to three)
I'm sure my family and friends will buy these things for me.
But those intangible, abstract desires? Only time will give them to me. Time and patience and perseverance and, if I'm honest with myself, a lot of bravery on my part. Because at my core, I'm realizing how much of a coward I am. At my core, I give up too easily when it seems I cannot get what I want. My pride and my ego always get in the way -- I'm always so afraid of looking like a fool -- and, try as I might, as positive and upbeat as my general outlook on life is, one bump in the road shifts my perspective. Always. I always equate these tiny bumps to unclimbable mountains and therein lies my problem: how can I get what I want, if I'm too scared to just go for it?
I do nothing but moan over my situation, rather than make the necessary moves to change it. Because I do know how to get these abstract things; I just have to find my courage.
And maybe that's all I need for Christmas this year: a little more courage.
Comments